only a few weeks until i graduate; and then only a few days that my best friend leaves; and then a few days later i leave to malaysia, then to holland. in the span of only one month, my life will drastically change. all i will have are these photographs to visually prove that all of this truly existed. i'm going to miss these spontaneous photographing adventures with my dear friend, kohl. i'm going to miss the places we go to hang out, even when we always talk about how uncomfortable they are. i'm going to miss being able to hop on a motorbike without knowing where to go but just riding for the sake of it. i'm going to miss the hot mornings when the sky is blue and the mountains clear. i'll even miss the deafening kind of rain, along with the soft rain that lasts forever, and the kind of rain that pours and pours but abruptly ends. everything that i know i'm going to miss later on is everything that i am trying to get away from now; and so i ask myself why, if i understand now how i will feel later, why i can't enjoy them all now. but as humans, we always find something to complain about, something that isn't good enough, something that doesn't please us, in everything. instead of realizing the small, obscure things that bring happiness and harmony in our lives. i've realized, however, that my photographs are my reminders of the small, seemingly insignificant things in my life that fill me with happiness. they fill the emptiness i so often feel, but sometimes are the cause of it. the belief that they aren't good enough; they aren't what people want to see. but what does that matter if they are what i see? more often than not, i'm caught in an unending state of confusion. i can't make sense of my words, thoughts, and sometimes actions. and it seems to me that you'll always be searching for yourself, for who you are; but you'll never fully grasp it, because we are constantly changing.
